February 8, 2007

Full of it, Not.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 2:53 pm

Today I underwent what has become a fairly common diagnostic procedure, which required 24-hours worth of advanced “preparation”. The preparation consisted of four laxative tablets and two ten-ounce bottles of citrate of magnesia spaced several hours apart. It also required close proximity to the loo.

Let me just say that Klee Irwin ain’t got nuttin’ on me.

I have been advised to “take it easy” today, which is nooooooo problem.

Later.

18 Comments »

  1. If you want it to blow you out good, go and drink a few cups of hot coffee, then you better run to the bathroom, it is called blow out city. I would rather run down a stray dog and kiss him square in the ass than to get that 6 foot rope stuck up my ass.

    Comment by Catfish — February 8, 2007 @ 3:50 pm

  2. Well, Jimbo, if that ain’t a Case of the Ass, I surely don’t know what is.

    (And how ironic that my witty retort was actually thought of while I was in the loo myself – albeit, whilst washing my hands. Still, though…what a crazy world.)

    Comment by Erica — February 8, 2007 @ 4:42 pm

  3. Catfish,
    That 6 ft snake was better than the gallon of “GoLightly” the night before. The need to stay in arm’s reach of the loo was bad enough, but the ‘grape’ flavor was worse than any gooey kiddy confection ever invented.
    As my wife says ” no grape flavor unless it’s merlot or shiraz”

    Comment by Mark Reardon — February 8, 2007 @ 4:43 pm

  4. Ah, my friend Bloglodyte Jim
    Just this morning my email was was graced by “ASSICONS” from friends in LA. And this evening perchance I stumbled on your Award-Winning Rest Stop and find this “Full of It” blog. Sweet! Herewith then, a few assicons to share:

    ( ! ) a regular ass

    (__!__) a fat ass

    (!) a tight ass

    (_*_) a sore ass

    With great admiration, Your pal,
    Stardust Shrink
    (_e=mc2_) a smart ass

    Comment by stardust shrink — February 8, 2007 @ 7:09 pm

  5. gah. I’m supposed to schedule a sphincter spelunking myself one of these days soon. Just how good are the sedation drugs they give you?

    Comment by gregor — February 8, 2007 @ 7:46 pm

  6. hey, how come you didn’t buy some of Klee Irwin’s Majick Colon Cleanser and Laminate Flooring Sealer?

    Comment by gregor — February 8, 2007 @ 8:17 pm

  7. Called to check in on you last night. Let’s just say that you were unable to come to the phone…

    Hope everything went well!

    Love,
    TJ (Your Daughter…just in case — with all the recent bootie-related trauma, you forgot!)

    Comment by TJ — February 8, 2007 @ 8:45 pm

  8. I hope the worst has “passed” by now and you’re back to feeling more normal.

    Comment by Teresa — February 8, 2007 @ 10:34 pm

  9. DOn’t you just love all this love and support your readers are showing you!

    Hope tomorrow you’re back to your old farookin’ self!

    Comment by Michele — February 8, 2007 @ 11:24 pm

  10. Aren’t those fun? Woo-hoo good times.

    How good is the sedation you ask Gregor? It depends on how your body processes the drugs. Mike didn’t remember a thing. I, OTOH, wasn’t so lucky. I woke up twice during the procedure. Not fun.

    Comment by rita — February 9, 2007 @ 6:40 am

  11. That ass funny.

    Comment by KeesKennis — February 9, 2007 @ 7:26 am

  12. I had this procedure this summer…had a million horse pills to take. Oh my. I got a lot of reading done…

    Comment by armywifetoddlermom — February 9, 2007 @ 11:43 am

  13. aw, poor guy… hope you are back to ‘normal’ by now.

    I’ve been “forgetting” to get this procedure for myself.

    Comment by Jean — February 9, 2007 @ 5:50 pm

  14. .. hang in there, buddy….

    Comment by Eric — February 9, 2007 @ 7:26 pm

  15. feel good bro, hope all is well.. i know the feelin , the bassman

    Comment by bass — February 9, 2007 @ 8:59 pm

  16. I’m scheduled for the same thing again this year.

    When I was in last, two years ago, they “found something” … so I get an earlier than normally scheduled return visit.

    You are lucky. I was sick for two days before the procedure, but I am told that there is an improved sequence that doesn’t need to plasticize your innerds before the procedure. I’ll believe it when I see it.

    Comment by The Thomas — February 9, 2007 @ 10:47 pm

  17. Jimbo – Here is one of the few advantages of being a cripple. They didn’t have to sedate me and I didn’t feel a thing. I was awake for the entire procedure. I felt like a Dimocrat since I had an excellent view up my ass.

    Comment by Denny — February 10, 2007 @ 4:50 pm

  18. Jim – Been there, done that – hope you had as easy a time as I did. The damn crap you have to drink to prepare is far, far worse than the procedure or afterwards.

    Gregor – the drugs were great in my case. I don’t remember anything, no recovery problems – was out eating lunch 3 hours after the procedure was over and feelin’ fine.

    Comment by Barb — February 17, 2007 @ 1:43 am

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