September 19, 2003
The comments vanished! Right in the middle of a scintillating peanut butter discussion too. Damn!
Update: They’re back. You may resume talking.
For the 9+ months I have been at this, I have often seen people posting answers to the â€œFriday Five.â€ Iâ€™ve often wondered where the Friday Five come from. I have no idea. Are they like dirty jokes (no disparagement intended), in that they just seem to pop up out of nowhere. Some used to say that dirty jokes are born in prisons. I tend to doubt that, because the prisons I have visited (just visiting, mind you) did not strike me as being the kinds of places where the residents sat around composing jokes. I could be wrong, but I donâ€™t think so.
Except for one time, I have never posted answers to the Friday Five, but I feel up to answering a few questions tonight. So, rather than searching all over the blogosphere for this weekâ€™s Friday Five, I thought that I would write my own very probing questions and provide you with my most thoughtful answers.
Without further ado, I give you Jimboâ€™s Do-It-Yourself Friday Five:
Question Number 1: Have you ever considered adding sawdust to your food as an inexpensive source of fiber?
Question Number 2: Have you ever thought about putting numbers on your socks so that they could be properly rotated at pre-specified times, thereby increasing their useful life?
Question Number 3: Wouldnâ€™t it be, like, way cool to carry a spit can and spit in it for a whole day it instead of swallowing?
Question Number 4: Wouldnâ€™t it be really exciting to drive through a tollbooth on the Garden State Parkway at 90 miles per hour? I mean, it would be like landing on an aircraft carrier. You know what I mean? You would have to line everything up just right and shit like that. Oh man, how cool would that be?
Question Number 5. Donâ€™t you think that it would be an uplifting experience to spend twenty-four consecutive hours in the menâ€™s room at the Port Authority Bus Terminal in New York City meeting and greeting those who come to pee?
That was a bitch. I hate hard questions.