November 19, 2005

Lines, Lines, Everywhere a Line.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 2:01 pm

Yo! Check this out.


I can hear you all saying to yourselves, “Yo, Jimbo. I don’t see anything.”

I figured as much. It’s the horizontal line that goes across the page. Lookit! Lookit! See?

I did the same thing in a post the day before yesterday, which you can scroll to or click here. Go look. I’ll wait.

[humming…tapping foot…humming some more]

OK, you’re back.

Now, don’t even think about telling me that you noticed the lines when you first saw them then. If you had noticed, I would have expected comments such as these:

”Jimbo, congratulations. Great lines, man. I really mean it. They are really something.”

“Awesome lines, Dude.”

“Jimbo, you are the Linemeister!”

“I have been depressed for months. Two days ago I was on the way out of the house to throw myself in front of a bus and I glanced at my computer and saw your lines. They changed everything for me. I’ve come to realize that I have a lot to live for. And, guess what? This morning I heard that I was hired for my dream job. Thanks, Jimbo!”

But did I get such comments? Nooooooo. That’s because lines are child’s play to you Virtuosi of Stylesheets and Houdinis of HTML – You who change layouts with the ease of changing socks. To me, Mr. Techno-Stoooopid, doing lines is a big farookin’ deal.

I can do lots of lines, like this.




Hell, I can make the line appear in the middle of the page, like this.


And, I can make ‘em fat, like this.


I can create interesting visual art. I call this one “Reading Between the Lines”.


The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.


I’m drunk with power.




Now, I shall rest.

Update: This is for ‘Neck, the smartass.. ;-)


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