PRS Operatives have learned that Senator Barbara Boxer, in conjunction with the Democratic National Committee and MoveOn.org, is considering a plan to
kidnap rescue and deprogram women and people of color who identify themselves as Republicans or, worse yet, conservatives.
The plan involves members of MoveOn.org
kidnapping rescuing people such as Condoleezza Rice, J.C. Watts, Lynn Swann and Michael Steele and removing them to an isolated area in Nevada where they will undergo intense and protracted deprogramming sessions. Most of the actual deprogramming will be conducted by Al Sharpton, a well-known spokesperson for the Progressive Movement.
While many of the details of the actual deprogramming process remain unknown, we have learned that the sessions will feature a montage of pictures of slaves and battered women juxtaposed with photos of Adolf Hitler, George McHitlerburtonchimpymissionaccomplishedrunkcollegefratboydrugaddledmoron, and Dick Cheney, all against an underlying sound bed of gangsta rap. Michael Moore will help with the audio-visuals.
Senator Boxer stated, â€œThese pathetic creatures obviously have been victimized by the cult of republicanism. We suspect that the brainwashing process may have started early in their childhood when they were forced by their uncaring parents to study and work hard. But, with the dedicated deprogramming effort, we hope to bring them back to the place where they rightfully belong. There is simply no way that these people could have made a rational choice to be a republican.â€
We understand that the deprogramming faculty will also include former Congresswoman Cynthia McKinney, Maureen Dowd, and Jesse Jackson. Mr. Jackson was quoted as saying, â€œIf you look like me, no G-O-P!! No justice, no peace!!â€