April 28, 2003

The Army Stories.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 9:10 pm

Several people who have been reading this blog before Sgt. Steele came along have suggested that I make a list of the posts I have written about my experiences in the Army as a draftee in 1968. But for these experiences, Sgt. Steele would not exist.

The same people also tell me that the real Army stories are quite amusing. I will happily take them at their word. I can tell you that they passed my chuckle-while-writing test. Having said that, I will also tell you that some of the real events that are amusing when told now were anything but amusing at the time to this scared-shitless “raw-CROOT,” who wanted nothing more than to honorably serve my country as a “Remington Raider.”

Because I do not pack the technical gear to create such a list in the margin of the blog (HTML makes my hair hurt), or to open up a new window to display the list (you might as well ask me to fly an F-16), this primitive format will have to do. So, here they are, should you be so inclined to take a look at them:

Greeting.

Army Underwear.

“You Must Have Cheated!”

Test Day. The Sergeant, and the Wannabe “Remington Raider.

Army Glasses.

Night Infiltration and the Pathetic Mondo Kane Turtle.

A.W.O.L.

Vertical Butt Stroke.

Sick Call.

K.P., The Great Lie, and the Potato Mountain.

Fort Dix Quickies.

Spit, Polish, Graduation, and Orders.

Fort Holabird or the Twilight Zone?

3 Comments »

  1. I read all the stories, They were great , I enlisted in the army in 1992 and it’s funny to see that things were the same even bck then

    Comment by Keith MAc — March 28, 2005 @ 5:35 pm

  2. Oh does that bring back memories. I kind of had worse, I had picked a specialty (Military Police) that had One Station Unit Training (OSUT) which combined Basic and Advanced training together, so it was 17 weeks of training with the same drill sgts in Ft. Mcclellan, AL. I went down there in Jan 03 which was a bad winter on the East Coast. One night we got about 3 feet of snow in Al and they had no freaking clue what to do with that much snow. The entire base shut down, it was the best 3 days of Basic. We did nothing but try and stay warm and write letters. Because I was a college graduate when I joined, I went in as a Specialist (E-4) and my National Guard unit had given me all of the crap that you put on a uniform before I left. So my class A’s had my rank, my unit patches, my Fruit Loop ribbon (for garduating Basic) and my qualification badges, which were all expert. The southern boys seemed a bit out that a Yankee from CT outshot all of them.
    I was kind of smart ass and the day we went home (or for the active duty people, to their future duty station) I was wearing jeans, cowboy boots that I has bought down there, a white baseball cap with Military Police on it and a t-shirt I had made at the PX. The t-shirt had an air-brushed image of a drill sergeant’s hat with the red circle around the hat with a red line through it, like the no smoking signs. I don’t think the drill sgt’s appreciated the humor.

    Comment by Michael in CT — December 13, 2008 @ 5:15 pm

  3. Enjoyed reading your linked Army stories. I was a “airdale swabbie” during part of the period – (1965-1968) and recognized my role as a ‘clueless one’ in your stories. ;-)

    Comment by JimBob — December 14, 2008 @ 10:04 am

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