April 18, 2011

Death is Not an Option III.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:31 pm

I think it’s time that we played “Death is Not an Option” again. We’ve played before here and here. But, for the newbies, the rules are simple. You must choose one of the options provided. It is most important to remember that death is not an option.


Here we go.

Would you rather:

(a) Eat a plate of boogers; or
(b) Do five-minutes of deep French kissing with Janet Napolitano?
Death is not an option.

(a) Drive cross-country with Debbie Wasserman Schultz; or
(b) Slam the car into a bridge abutment at 90 mph before you hit the Jersey – Pennsylvania line?
Death is not an option.

(a) Swim with hungry alligators; or
(b) Have dinner with the Obamas? (This one really gives me the willies.)
Death is not an option.

(a) Mug it up with a camel; or
(b) Wrestle naked on a Wesson Oil-coated plastic sheet with Michael Moore?
Death is not an option.

(a) Lick clean the men’s room floor in the Port Authority Bus Terminal in New York City; or
(b) Change Frank Lautenberg’s diaper?
Death is not an option.

Piece of cake, right?


  1. Sorry about vomiting at the first one. Ruined all the rest.

    Comment by Captain Jerry — April 18, 2011 @ 11:13 pm

  2. Gawd! What a pack of choice`s….I could only venture to answer one. I`ll swim with the hungry alligators, those which choose to chase me will be swimming upstream in a river of fresh shit & I will not end up in a cannibal`s iron pot over a wood fire surrounded by Obama`s tribe in Kenya watching the Wookie dancing around in a grass skirt to the tune of the jungle drum quartet.

    Comment by dudley1 — April 19, 2011 @ 8:11 am

  3. Strictly speaking, not “dead”: I’ll take the bridge abutment; with any luck, I’d end up sufficiently comatose as to avoid having to choose any of the others.

    Comment by Permatourist — April 19, 2011 @ 10:17 am

  4. Jimbo,you are at the top of your game.There’s no way out.Even if we could feed Schultz,Moore,Napolitano and the Obamas to the alligators,PETA would file suit alleging we fed fecal matter to wildlife.Sometime you just can’t win.

    Comment by john — April 19, 2011 @ 10:07 pm

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