February 8, 2005

Corzine on the Campaign Trail.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 7:26 pm

As most of you know, the Acting Governor of New Jersey, Richard Codey, has decided not to seek an elected term as Governor this fall, thereby clearing the way for U.S. Senator Jon Corzine to be the nominee of the democrat party. As such, Senator Corzine has already begun making campaign appearances.

Parkway Rest Stop operatives were on the scene with Senator Corzine at a recent, early-morning campaign appearance on Broad Street in Newark, near a busy bus stop. Here is what they saw and heard:

Corzine: (To Guy #1) “Good morning, sir. I’m Jon Corzine, and I’m running for governor.”

Guy #1: “What?”

Corzine: “Jon Corzine, I’m running for governor, and I would like your support.”

Guy #1: “Who?”

Corzine: “I’m Jon Corzine, Senator Jon Corzine.”

Guy #1: “Look, I’m running late. I don’t have time for this.”


Corzine: (To Guy #2) “Good morning, sir, and how are you today? I’m Jon Corzine and I’m running for governor.”

Guy #2: “Who’d you say you are?”

Corzine: “Jon Corzine, Sen……

Guy #2: “Hey, weren’t you just elected to something or other?”

Corzine: “Yes, that was the Senate in 2000.”

Guy #2: “Well what’s wrong with that job?”

Corzine: “I feel that I can be more effective as…….”

Guy #2: “Bullshit. You sound like a job-hopper to me. That looks lousy on a resume. I gotta get to work.”


Corzine: (To Guy #3) “Hello there. I’m Jon Corzine and I’m running for governor.”

Guy #3: “I don’t care who you are. I’m trying to get to work here. If you don’t get outta my way, I’m gonna be late.”

Corzine: “Here’s a hundred bucks for you.”

Guy #3: “Holy shit! Who’d you say you are?”

Corzine: “Jon Corzine, and I’m ……”

Guy #3: “Running for governor, right? You got my vote, Bro. You’re my guy. Absolutely.”


  1. Who did you say that was???

    Comment by Michele — February 8, 2005 @ 9:09 pm

  2. I think it could really be like that too.

    Comment by Kate — February 9, 2005 @ 8:45 am

  3. Guy 3: Who’s that old buffoon with you with the bad plaid jacket and tie?

    Corzine: That’s my campaign manager, Sen. Lautenberg.

    Guy 3: Tell that relic that his fly is open.

    He looks like Uncle Floyd’s father in that jacket. He has oatmeal on his face, and is making less sense than Tommy Hearns. Take him to the dog track. Hey, aren’t you the guy who used to be on TV hugging that fruitcake Mc Greevey ?

    Comment by cousin gary — February 9, 2005 @ 9:46 am

  4. If one of the Republicans steps up in weight Corzine’s going to be spending a deal more than $100 a vote.

    Comment by Mike — February 9, 2005 @ 2:34 pm

  5. Funny, all we received from Corzine was a big, fat tax bill. Thanks for the blogroll link.

    Comment by Enlighten-New Jersey — February 9, 2005 @ 4:22 pm

  6. Here in Hoboken we once had a Ward Councilman who handed out $50 on election day to ‘workers’. On election day, of course, everyone in that ward became a ‘worker’. Essentially this is what you’re satirizing here with Corzine. When they break down campaign spending numbers on a per-vote basis, it would be entirely possible for Corzine to directly give each voter a nice piece of change in exchange for a vote. The amounts raised and spent on elections are staggering – here in Hoboken, one candidate for mayor is contemplating raising ‘at least’ $400,000 for his campaign – and he is only one of three candidates. The incumbent will spend vastly more.

    The problem with candidates handing out money directly (I don’t mean the ETHICAL problem, just the pragmatic one) is that it casts a shadow. The bad vibe gets picked up in the press, people feel guilty, and then they realize hey wait – I can take this guy’s money and then vote for whoever I want. No one will know. So the whole deal falls apart.

    That’s why political candidates don’t buy votes directly. And it’s the ONLY reason they don’t do it, too, because they would if they could. Instead, they buy their votes indirectly via PR and ad campaigns.

    Even the notorious Hoboken Ward Boss I mentioned eventually lost his seat. He worked the town’s most indigent ward this way, for years, during a period when the whole town had hit the skids. But as Hoboken became more affluent and his vote-buying gained wider notice, the shame outweighed the cash and he was ousted, and never heard from again.

    Comment by Mr. Snitch — February 21, 2005 @ 12:34 pm

  7. Mr. Snitch,

    You are quite right that, as a practical matter, handing out cash for votes in the long run probably won’t work in the long run (or at least, at some point, becomes uneconomic). However, for incumbents, handing out no-show jobs (a grand tradition in Hudson County and in New Jersey in general) works much better.

    Comment by Jim - Parkway Rest Stop — February 21, 2005 @ 1:01 pm

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