September 10, 2005

Say What?

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 10:58 am

As I was doing my morning walk in the beautiful weather today I got to thinking about homonyms and homophones and how those little buggers could cause a person trying to learn English to conclude that English can be one very screwy language. I constructed the following two sentences, which, admittedly are a bit contrived, but which illustrate the point.

Her beau stood at the bow of the ship wearing, on his lapel, the red bow she had given him the day he won the archery championship using the bow he made from a bough of a hickory tree, and after which he proudly took a bow before the applauding audience.

So, it appears that you will have to sew the bag so that you can use it to sow the seeds to replace the grass that was trampled by the sow.

There’s simply no accounting for the kinds of goofy stuff I think about while strutting my shit in the mornings.


  1. You are goofy, but that’s just one of the many reasons you are so loved!! 😀

    Comment by Dana — September 10, 2005 @ 6:58 pm

  2. Today’s English lesson

    You gotta love Jim and the crap that goes through his head….. Homonyms and Homophones: Her beau stood at the bow of the ship wearing, on his lapel, the red bow she had given him the day he won the…

    Trackback by Not Exactly Rocket Science — September 10, 2005 @ 10:04 pm

  3. Living in SoCal I am exposed to Spanglish and Spanish all the time. I know a little Spanish (numbers, etc.) but I’m no where near fluent.

    I’d really like to know what a non-English speaker makes of a ‘4 Sale’ sign?

    The only equivalent abbreviation I know of is in French, ‘K7’ for cassette…

    Comment by RickT — September 11, 2005 @ 1:19 am

  4. They say English is the hardest language to learn because it has more peccadillos than any other. It’s incredibly frustrating to teach it to kids whose first language is Spanish, in which everything sounds exactly the way it’s spelled and has very few homophones (the only one I know is hola [hello] and ola [a wave]).

    Comment by marydell — September 11, 2005 @ 6:54 am

  5. .. it’s a wonder we can read at all…

    Comment by Eric — September 11, 2005 @ 2:57 pm

  6. since we’re talking about the english language here is a little known fact about how Perry Como got his name.

    one day his mum was busy killing armadilloes in the garden when little perry came around the corner carrying a pick ax. he musta been six or seven years old and at the time, was known as perry smith…after all, his parents were The Smiths so it was only natural perry would be perry smith.

    perry’s mum saw him with the pick ax and said, “perry, come here son, i need your help…and bring that pick ax with you” perry ran over and asked how he could help his dear sainted mum who he loved with all his heart.

    “you can kill this damn armadillo for me” she said, wiping the sweat from her brow.

    “sure, mum” perry said and he proceeded to swing the pick ax at the armadillo, repeatedly. unfortunately, being only six at the time, his swings were weak in nature and the tip of the ax barely penetrated the armadillo’s shell which caused the little creature to run around in a panic. perry chased after him, swinging the ax at every chance but, still, he couldnt get the darn thing impaled on the tip.

    To which mrs. smith cried out, “oh perry, you’re knocking over my prize tomato plants and causing such a ruckus! Now, just back off and I’ll take it from here.” Then she grabbed a nearby 20 gauge shotgun, waited for little perry to run for cover and then blew that armadillo into about ten million itty bitty pieces.

    perry came out from his hiding spot, staring at the remains of the armadillo in amazement. “golly, mum, you sure showed him.”

    “and you, young man, caused such a fuss, i’mm gonna start calling you “comotion”, perry comotion”, his mom replied, wiping armadillo guts from her forehead.

    and so perry smith became known as perry comotion except that later in life he got tired of everyone making fun of his name so one night, in a drunken rage, he told everyone to just start calling him perry como, for short. and they did.

    you’re welcome.

    Comment by mr. helpful — September 12, 2005 @ 2:43 am

  7. Golly, Mr. Helpful. That was really a swell story.

    “Dream along with me. I’m on my way to the stars.”

    Comment by Jim - Parkway Rest Stop — September 12, 2005 @ 3:49 am

  8. “There’s simply no accounting for the kinds of goofy stuff I think about while strutting my shit in the mornings.”

    You can say that again!

    Comment by michele — September 14, 2005 @ 12:05 pm

  9. Hell Week Deux w/a Silver Lining

    Treo blogging as I walk around the block several times to clear my head and take a break. It’s been Hell Week in NYC. Over 40 dignitaries (Presidents, Prime Ministers, etc.) from all over the world have descended on the big apple all at once for the op…

    Trackback by Letters from NYC — September 14, 2005 @ 12:33 pm

  10. On the downside, how many Red Lines did the PC give your homophonia?

    Comment by Nightfly — September 14, 2005 @ 2:00 pm

  11. good service

    Comment by Frank Johnson — November 4, 2005 @ 10:50 pm

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