The Answer to Ben & Jerry’s.
The Star Spangled Ice Cream Company is targeting those who “enjoy ice cream, but do NOT like seeing your money funneled to wacko left-wing causes.” The company offers mail order ice cream that it describes as “an exquisitely delicious hand-crafted super premium ice cream featuring a smoothness, texture and taste you simply cannot find in supermarkets.” The manufacturer states that it donates ten percent of its profits “to charities that support the men and women of our armed forces.”

Ya gotta love the flavors. Currently available are:

I Hate the French Vanilla
Iraqi Road
Smaller GovernMINT
Nutty Environmentalist

The flavors under development are even better:

Cowardly German Chocolate
Irrelevant Belgian Chocolate
Dutch (Reagan) Chocolate
Donald Rum Raisin
US Army Tank Crunch
US Navy Battle-Chip
US Air Force Over-The-Rainbow Sherbet
US Marine Tough Cookies & Cream
School Prayerleens & Creme
Gun Nut
Clinton Im-Peach
White House Fundraiser Coffee
Peanut Malaise

Damn, it’s great to be an American.

Thanks to Mark at Not Quite Tea and Crumpets for finding this gem.