July 25, 2006

A Surprise from Dixie.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:22 pm

Poland Spring Bottle.jpgOver the weekend, several of the Usual Suspect gathered on The Deck to engage in meaningful discussion shoot the shit and have tea adult beverages and scones take-out Italian food. Usual Suspect Jeff, of assembling-my-new-grill fame, showed up and presented me with a gift.

“I brought this for Jimbo,” he said as he placed a bottle in front of me that looked exactly like the one shown to the left.

I was momentarily puzzled. Why would my pal give me a bottle of Poland Spring water? It’s very good water, but surely he knows that I have a couple cases of the stuff at home. I’m pretty sure that he does too.

I believe I said, “Thanks, but I don’t get it.”

He suggested that I open the bottle and give it whiff.

I did.

Holy Mason-Dixon Line! I’d know that bouquet anywhere!

As sure as you’re born, it was genuine, crystal-clear, corn squeezin’s “homemade wine”. Jeff explained that it came, via a friend, directly from North Carolina, where it was probably aged a full day.

Never having sampled this magic Dixie Elixir, the Usual Suspects at the table (all Jersey born and bred) each wanted a taste. (They get an A+ for having a spirit of adventure). I poured a small bit into a glass and passed it around.

The good news for me is that, to a one, they hated it. “Jesus Christ!!” “Holy shit!!” and “How can you drink this stuff?” were but a few of the comments, I heard, which were all interspersed with fits of coughing and choking.

Consequently, I brought damned near the entire bottle home and placed it in Mr. Freezer and, from which, I have enjoyed a post-work taste or two every night since. I tell you, my fellow Yankees, it is about the best post-hard day “calmer downer” there is.

And that’s just one of the many things I like about the South.


  1. Jimbo….you have to cross the state line to get some good moonshine

    Comment by chef of da future — July 25, 2006 @ 9:26 pm

  2. I gotta hand it to you Jim…you are a STUD! I live in the mountains of North Carolina where moonshine wasn’t born but certainly was perfected and even I can’t handle that shit! I can drink enough Vodka to make three men stagger but NC Mountain moonshine makes me try and take my pants off over my head everytime. Wouldn’t be so bad except for those unsightly “zipper gashes” on my chin!
    I’ve got a buddy here in Junior Johnson land who’s a professional moonshiner AND a cock fighter…he tries his dead level best to slip me some “Shine” without my knowledge every time we get together to pick guitars. I’m thinking seriously about killing him before HE kills ME!
    Even though you’re a Yankee, I really enjoy reading you. Hell my old man WAS a Yankee ’till he got better. So, I suppose I’m “tolerant” of your breed. He still says “Baldimur” instead of “Baltimore” but the old dude finally learned how to say “Ya’ll” properly.
    Keep on sippin’ that Dew and let me know if you run out. It flows like mountain streams around these parts.

    Comment by Ron Doble — July 25, 2006 @ 10:45 pm

  3. We used to have bottles just like that back when I lived in Saudi. Damn useful stuff.

    Comment by Ken Adams — July 25, 2006 @ 10:57 pm

  4. If NASA could figure out how to write the Purchase Order for it, they’d be using the stuff as rocket fuel.

    Comment by DMerriman — July 25, 2006 @ 10:59 pm

  5. what’s all the fuss??…it’s good stuff!

    Comment by Jean — July 26, 2006 @ 7:56 am

  6. Oh good, if anyone ever decides to send me moonshine, I now know exactly who I can pass it along to. *grin* (not that anyone has ever offered it to me… but there’s always a chance)

    Comment by Teresa — July 26, 2006 @ 3:11 pm

  7. … I’m bringing some to Helen, bro… damn, Jimbo… I’m proud of you….

    Comment by Eric — July 26, 2006 @ 4:56 pm

  8. Jimbo,

    I am with you…love the stuff. Like warm butter I tell you. I still have my “jar”…cough not, and also use it special ocassions, like when the moon needs a good howlin’

    Comment by armywifetoddlermom — July 26, 2006 @ 9:34 pm

  9. I’m trying this stuff next time I get the opportunity, dammit. I was going to try at shot at Eric’s but when they found I didn’t drink at all, the shot was given to someone else. Next time I’m takin’ it anyway.

    Comment by Bou — July 27, 2006 @ 5:23 pm

  10. “Oh they call it that good old mountan dew,
    And them that refuse it are few.
    I’ll hush up my mug if you’ll fill up my jug
    With that good old mountain dew.”

    Shoot, I had my first taste when I was just a little sprout. Good ‘shine should be smooth. Well as smooth as liquid nitro can be anyway.

    Comment by rita — July 27, 2006 @ 5:30 pm

  11. Bou, DAHling,

    Be careful. Be verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry careful.

    Comment by Jim — July 27, 2006 @ 7:01 pm

  12. My only concern is that it’ll burn the tissue off my esophagus…

    Comment by Bou — July 28, 2006 @ 11:56 pm

  13. Moonshine can kill or blind you if it is not made properly. It has been know that some moonshine is made in the cooling systems of old cars for example so the engine turned on, heats and speeds up the process.

    If you are going to drink the stuff, first pour some in a teaspoon and burn it. If it sparks it has metal filings in it and it is no good and should be poured on the ground so no-one else can drink it either. If it has only a nice flame is is better than the stuff that sparks.

    I would not drink it at all if I were you.

    I lived for a short while in a dry county and the moonshiner delivered to your home if he knew you. For the rest of us we had to drive 50 miles to another county for some legal beer, but could not bring it home because you could get fined or put into the county jail with the contrabound if caught.

    Comment by Bob — July 30, 2006 @ 5:53 pm

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