August 25, 2007


Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 12:45 pm

So now it seems that my cyber-pal Hoosierboy has followed the lead of the Wiseass Jooette and is taking shots at the Garden State, including our beaches.

OK, let’s toowalk beaches.


Here is Brooklyn’s “Premier” Beach, Coney Island, in its heyday. Be watchful for floaters coming from Sheepshead Bay.


Here is a more recent photo of Brooklyn’s Pearl by the Sea.

So much for Brooklyn.

On to Indiana.

Welcome to Indiana.


Here’s what passes for a beach in Indiana.

Truthfully, the closest Indiana Peeps ever get to salt water is the Epsom variety in which they soak after spending a fun-filled day shoveling shit out of the barn.

In Jersey, we have something like 120 miles of beaches. Here is a sampling.

And, we don’t pump our own gas.


  1. LOL – okay this nearly demands its own post, but I’m too lazy right now. So… google “Indiana Dunes” – click on images – and have a look at the excellent beaches on Lake Michigan.

    And yes, I know you Joisey boys don’t pump your own gas.

    I was at the gas station the other day… a family from the Garden State stopped to get gas. Now I realize that a new station means reading the pump to see how it works… this guy read the pump very carefully (he was reading when I pulled in to pump my gas – which was 11 gallons worth) and continued to read for about 3 more minutes… this not being rocket science I couldn’t figure out what was taking him so long.

    Eventually he lifted the pump, turned it on, and turned around… only to find that he hadn’t taken the cap off the gas tank. It was a dilemma for a few moments. Do you turn off the pump and put it down? Or do you hold the hose and open with one hand? He opted, after a 30 second stop to consider, for the one hand method, so I had the amusement of watching him try to juggle everything. *grin* Of course about that time I got done, got my receipt and left, giggling to myself. He was just beginning to pump the many gallons that would fill up an SUV. (I know I’m easily amused)

    You Garden Staters just aren’t prepared for life in the real world. LOL.

    Comment by Teresa — August 25, 2007 @ 1:52 pm

  2. Word, T! “Jersey Intelligence,” an oxymoron par excellence.

    I got ya beaches RIGHT HERE, Hairboy!

    Comment by Erica — August 25, 2007 @ 1:59 pm

  3. “You Garden Staters just aren’t prepared for life in the real world”

    Yeah…I guess that’s why Nooh Yawkers need so many laws to “show them the way”. Poor babies. They’re usually pretty helpless once they’re removed from their cocoon. They truly DO stick out like a sore thumb WHEREVER they go! 😉

    Here’s a little gem for you Jim:

    Unlike Noo Yawk, we have plenty in the Garden State to be proud of. Except for Lautenburg and Menendez (perfect together). Of course, Noo Yawkers are so clueless they imported/elected another carperbagger (The Hildebeast) to “represent” them. I chuckle just thinking about THAT! 🙂

    Comment by Jerry K — August 25, 2007 @ 2:29 pm

  4. Jerry, trust me, I don’t like the Cankled Beast (not to be confused with this Cankled Beast) any more than you do. I’ve voted Republican for the past few years, in every election.

    “…we have plenty in the Garden State to be proud of. Except for Lautenburg and Menendez (perfect together)…”

    …and Sharpe James, and Jon “I Should Be Dead” Corzine, and the kleine feigele governor before him, who maybe I should refer to as Reverend Kleine Feigele, and so on.

    Plenty to be proud of?! My sides are splittin’ here. Even your New Jersey Nets are moving to Brooklyn.


    Comment by Erica — August 25, 2007 @ 5:06 pm

  5. Thought I saw a gator in one of those pictures.

    Comment by aithne — August 25, 2007 @ 6:31 pm

  6. Sorry Erica, MORE Noo Yawkers migrate over here (SADLY!) than Joisey people moving to the armpit called Brooklyn. You will NEVER live Saturday Night Fever down!! :-)NEVER!! HA! In fact, DOUBLE HA! Nyah!

    Comment by Jerry K — August 25, 2007 @ 6:53 pm

  7. Jimbo,
    You must not have heard of our most famous beach:

    Comment by Jerry — August 25, 2007 @ 8:51 pm

  8. Is there a bog war going on that I’m missing?

    Comment by Dick — August 25, 2007 @ 10:10 pm

  9. It’s a crummy pic, but here’s my beach. About a mile from my condo.

    Comment by Joan of Argghh! — August 25, 2007 @ 11:00 pm

  10. Ooooh! Link-love from Jimbo! Thanks!

    Comment by Joan of Argghh! — August 25, 2007 @ 11:02 pm

  11. I’m about 5 miles from LBI – and it’s GORGEOUS! Besides, pumping your own gas is, in my opinion, SO overrated.

    Comment by Kate — August 26, 2007 @ 12:34 am

  12. Sadly I could drive one minute in any direction and that road in the corn picture is what I wouuld see in my windshield.

    I once had to go to Cape May for a sales meeting I was not impressed. I could not stand to be on the beach for more than five minutes. Maybe because it was in December?

    Comment by hoosierboy — August 26, 2007 @ 7:59 am

  13. I love walking on the beach in December, and it is best followed by a trip to a comfortable saloon for a snifter of brandy.


    Comment by Jim — August 26, 2007 @ 9:10 am

  14. We have the best beaches.

    Hands down.

    Comment by Mark — August 26, 2007 @ 12:19 pm

  15. I love Erica, but any comparison of Brooklyn beaches to the Jersey Shore is laughable, at best. A few of my own snaps of the South Jersey shore are here:

    Incidentally, out of impatience I did pump my own gas today (having lived in places where an “attendant” was unheard-of). I got a very funny earful from the very Apu-esque owner:

    “Oh, good sir, certainly I do not mind you pumping your own gas, but please be aware there is no discount here for self-service”.

    Comment by Jersey — August 26, 2007 @ 1:02 pm

  16. Oh joy. I’ve now earned the right to don a tee-shirt that reads “Someone in Jersey loves me.” Bon Jovi should maybe write a song.

    What is that *thing,* BTW, that passes for a beach in Indiana? What in the hay-ell is that?

    Comment by Erica — August 26, 2007 @ 2:05 pm

  17. I’m still reeling — reeling I tell you — from the news that Jersey peeps don’t pump their own gas. No shit? I truly didn’t know there WAS such a law. I have questions now. They require answers.

    What’s the specific rationale for that law? I assume it’s about public safety, but what exactly is supposed to go wrong if people pump their own? Or is the prohibition strictly, uh, etiquette-based?

    (Interestingly, says there’s no evidence, yet, that using cell phones at gas stations can cause fires/explosion, even though lots of pumps in the US now carry the warning stickers.)

    Comment by dogette — August 26, 2007 @ 3:23 pm

  18. The *thing* that passes for a beach in Indiana is an irrigation device (I don’t know its formal name), which delivers water to the crops.


    Comment by Jim — August 26, 2007 @ 3:35 pm

  19. It’s a center pivot sprinkler.

    Or, um, so I’ve heard.

    Comment by Craig — August 26, 2007 @ 3:40 pm

  20. My word, somebody has a chip on their shoulder today. And what would I, the the Cool-Ass Urban Jooette of the Concrete Jungle, Planet Brooklyn, USA, know of irrigation contraptions, Mr. Fresh Mouf?

    [that was rhetorical]

    Comment by Erica — August 26, 2007 @ 3:53 pm

  21. Hey give the self service impaired a break here. When the full serve went out of business and I was forced to pump my own for the first time in years, I couldn’t get the gas cap off. I’d never seen it before and the freaking thing had 17 lines of warnings and instructions on it. I had to get some kids to help me. And I’m not from New Jersey.

    Comment by Libby — August 26, 2007 @ 9:35 pm

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