February 28, 2008

To the Asshole on Route 22 This Morning ……

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:43 pm

Dear Shit for Brains,

Surely you noticed the Big, Fat, Black Capitalist Car zooming along at about 60 miles per hour when you decided to make a hard right turn onto the highway about one hundred feet in front of me. I figured you were reckless, but that you would at least nail your accelerator so as to put some distance between us.

No, you chose to pull in front of me and do twenty farookin’ miles per hour, thereby putting my anti-lock brakes to the test.

God must have watched over your sorry ass today, gnat brain, because I suspect you have no idea how close you came to wearing a two ton Big, Fat, Black Capitalist Hat.



  1. It was a driver from Massachusetts. I know it.

    Comment by Teresa — February 28, 2008 @ 8:58 pm

  2. More like a Chinese driver from California.

    Comment by LeeAnn — February 28, 2008 @ 9:01 pm

  3. For real. I have no problem with someone cutting in front in moving traffic, but fer cripes n’ all, FIND the F’ins Acclerator. NOW!!

    Prolly some damn tourist. From Florida.

    Payback is hell!

    Comment by Joan of Argghh! — February 28, 2008 @ 9:20 pm

  4. Oh GAAAWD, I believe I do know what you mean. Those assholes who turn reeeeeeeeeeally slooooowly, like they’re afraid they’re going to tip over. I’ve actually said that aloud to them when they do that in front of me. I know they can’t hear me, but I like to sneer in over-the-top sarcasm-hysterics, “Careful!!! Don’t friggin’ TIP OVER in the turn there!!!! God’s SAKE!!! Slow DOWN!!! YOU MANIAC!!!!” and I kinda grip my steering wheel so my knuckles go all white and — oh nevermind. I hate driving.

    Comment by dogette — February 28, 2008 @ 9:50 pm

  5. … so, you had to hit your brakes?…

    Comment by Eric — February 28, 2008 @ 10:08 pm

  6. I’m agreeing with Joan. Florida Driver.

    Comment by Bou — February 29, 2008 @ 7:16 am

  7. I suspect that it might have been the governor, over-reacting to that 92 mph crash he had.

    Comment by Suzette — February 29, 2008 @ 7:39 am

  8. Hate those SOBs. They’re the ones that would cause the accident (someone plowing into your rearend, for instance) and continue to drive off completely oblivious to what happened behind them.

    Comment by joated — February 29, 2008 @ 8:11 am

  9. It’s people like that who cause an accident, and then try to sue the other person for it.

    I will never forget some idiot woman was behind me in front of the Fort Pitt Tunnels, when she suddenly smacked into my rear bumper. I stopped my car, opened up my door, and gave her an evil glare for a second or two. When we got to the open area in front of the tunnels, I pulled over, and got out of my car to inspect any damage acquired due to this woman’s stupidity. I found no damage (my car has 80,000 miles on it, what do I care anyway) at all, even the paint was untouched. By the time I was done inspecting my car, the woman pulled up behind me. Her bumper didn’t have the same luck mine did. As she was getting out of her car, I looked at her, and yelled out “learn to fuckin’ drive you moron!” and then got back into my car and drove away. I looked in the rearview mirror and saw her standing there looking dumb, as I pulled away.


    Comment by Braden — February 29, 2008 @ 9:53 am

  10. I tell you peeps, I know FER SURE it wasn’t a New York driver because, if it were, there would be traces of burnt rubber all over the road leading to New York as he broke every traffic law and speed limit known to man to get his ass out of the GAHden State, not to mention a slowly-moving BFBCC left completely nonplussed in a cloud of smoke.

    The seasoned road warriors known as New York drivers hold this truth to be self-evident, that not all motorists are created equal.

    Comment by Erica — February 29, 2008 @ 7:16 pm

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