June 11, 2008

Aloha? Oy.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Elisson @ 10:39 pm

I will give an honest try-ee
To tell you of Blue Hawai’i,
The land of lava, leis, and lomi-lomi.
For Jimbo has gone there,
With his Great Farookin’ Hair,
Which is thick enough to snap your av’rage comb-ee.

Oh, the girls (grass-skirted, brown),
Will attempt to lay you down,
If you quaff enough of all them yummy Mai-Tais.
And they’ll really start to school ya,
And commence to dance the Hula,
The better for to bounce their perky Tai-Tais.

You’d best keep it in your pants
When the ladies start to dance,
For to monkey with the locals is forbidden –
Lest you be caught by the Wife,
Who might go and grab a knife
And Bobbitize the part of you that’s hidden.

8 Comments »

  1. A true work of art Elisson! ROFLMAO!!!

    Comment by Teresa — June 12, 2008 @ 12:15 am

  2. Wow!!! You should be writing lyrics in Nashville!!! I’m impressed!

    Comment by Dave — June 12, 2008 @ 7:55 am

  3. Very nicely done, Jimbo!

    Mahalo.

    Comment by Jerry — June 12, 2008 @ 10:43 am

  4. Ah…Lorena Bobbit…da goil who became a moyel. Du hot a schmutzigger cruller, Reb Elisson.

    Comment by Erica — June 12, 2008 @ 10:05 pm

  5. ROFLMAO!!!
    Oh man is that ever priceless!

    Comment by Maeve — June 12, 2008 @ 10:08 pm

  6. Oops. I guess the author kudos go to Elisson. I shoulda known (and read on the byline). Jimbo could never write anything this classy.

    Comment by Jerry — June 13, 2008 @ 7:09 am

  7. … ha!..

    Comment by Eric — June 13, 2008 @ 8:53 am

  8. Oh that’s just sick! Loved it looong time!!!!

    Comment by JihadGene — June 14, 2008 @ 3:18 pm

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