July 15, 2008

Jersey Crap.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 9:05 pm

1. This is not a great way to start out one’s career in law enforcement. But, hey, it’s New Jersey.

2. I’m not saying that this person deserves the death penalty (It’s outlawed in Jersey, anyway. Yeah, I know.), but the nimrod who kept these beasts in an apartment deserves a serious slapping around. The Wiseass Jooette sent me the story. After the slapping around, I say we give this keeper of reptiles a one-way ticket to Brooklyn.

3. Speaking of reptiles, I received this from my buddy Walrilla.

8 Comments »

  1. Uh, Hairboy….hate to burst your bubble, bubele (alliteration – sweet!), but I am a fan of reptiles…seriously…I love them. Neeners. You’re afraid and I’m not!

    Which reminds me, short story: This past Thursday, I had occasion to pet a really long, thick, fat snake in Coney Island (a guy was standing on the avenue advertising that you can have your photo taken with the thing for $5).

    We asked him, what do you feed the snake? And you know what the buttmunch said? Mices. He said he feeds it “mices.” Well, I tried to set his sorry ass straight. “You mean, you feed it mice.” “No,” he said, “because I feed it more than one…I feed it many mices.”

    “Dude,” I said, “one mouse, many mice…you either feed it a single mouse, or you feed it mice.” He just didn’t get it. A freakin’ dooshbag.

    Comment by Erica — July 15, 2008 @ 10:31 pm

  2. Major duh moment, and apologies for hogging the comments, but I had read what you wrote incorrectly: I thought you wrote give the reptiles a one-way ticket to Brooklyn. Which wouldn’t be so terrible.

    As you can see from my previous comment, we’re already stocked to the rafters in dooshbags as it is. Tanks, but no tanks. He’s all yours.

    Comment by Erica — July 15, 2008 @ 11:07 pm

  3. You mean to tell me the other cops knew it was illegal to sell those drugs? Kewl! I wouldn’t have given them credit for that much brain power. ­čśë

    As for the dooshbag with the reptiles… I wonder what he’d say if the cops stuck him in a 3X3 closet with air holes and told him they’d be back to feed him occasionally… the wanker.

    Comment by Teresa — July 15, 2008 @ 11:09 pm

  4. Troy Hills Village Apts. are right down the road from where I work. I believe its full of Village Idiots.

    Comment by Linda — July 16, 2008 @ 9:15 am

  5. I’m with Teresa on the 3×3 closet for the dumbass tenant. People don’t think.

    Yeesh.

    Comment by Da Goddess — July 16, 2008 @ 9:58 am

  6. “Career in law enforcement”
    I spent over two decades as a volunteer firefighter. I recall one training class many years ago when the instructor let the class stray from the subject matter to firefighter’s fascination with fire. He then posed a question to the class..”What’s the difference between a firefighter and an arsonist?” After a moment he raise his hand by way of illustration with his thumb and forefinger about 1/8 inch apart and said..”About this much.” Everyone in the class knew what he meant and I sometimes think the same thing holds true regarding cops and criminals.

    Comment by Tbird — July 16, 2008 @ 12:40 pm

  7. Tbird,

    I think you’re on to something.

    Jimbo

    Comment by Jim — July 16, 2008 @ 9:06 pm

  8. I’m with the others on a teeny tiny living space for that dooshbag. What a horrible way for that lovely snake to live in.

    Comment by Maeve — July 17, 2008 @ 8:16 am

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