November 3, 2004

At Home with John and Teresa. No. 20

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:01 pm

John: “Well, that’s it, Teresa. I made my concession speech. I’m absolutely exhausted, emotionally and physically, and I know that you must be too.”


John: “I know just what we need. We need to get away for a few weeks to rest and regroup. I was thinking that we should hop on the Glufstream 5 and head off for Paris for a week or so, and maybe after that, Monte Carlo. I could do some windsurfing.”

Teresa: “You’d better think again, Jake.”

John: “Huh?”

Teresa: “Get out.”

John: “Get out? What are you talking about?”

Teresa: “You heard me. Get your ass out of here. Pierre is packing up your shit now. Be sure to tell him where to send it.”

John: “You must be teasing me, Muffin. You can’t be serious.”

Teresa: “Do I look like I’m doing comedy here? I want you out of here, now!”

John: “I can’t believe this. Why?”

Teresa: “Our deal was the White House – nothing less. You lost, so now you can hit the goddamned bricks.”

John: “I know you’re upset, Muffin. Maybe a couple weeks away would do us both good.”

Teresa: “Asshole, what part of GET OUT didn’t you get? Get out!”

John: “OK, I am sure that you will feel better in a day or so, so I’ll spend a couple days in our place in Nantucket, and call you from there.”

Teresa: “What do you mean ‘our place’ in Nantucket? The house in Nantucket and all the other houses are mine, Dork Puss. Remember the agreement you signed?”

John: “But Muffin, where will I go? What will I do?”

Teresa: “Frankly, John, I don’t give a damn.”



  1. Spot On!! Got it in one.

    Comment by MommaBear — November 3, 2004 @ 8:41 pm

  2. Outstanding work this year on the “At Home with John and Teresa” series. Luckily next year the “Home” will not be the White House.

    Comment by roberto — November 3, 2004 @ 8:42 pm

  3. Sorry to see the series end but, considering the reason, not too sorry.

    Comment by aelfheld — November 3, 2004 @ 9:22 pm

  4. You know, I have been waiting for this story for a while. I really have n doubt it is coming, and likely sooner rather than later. After all, why spend so much dead-republican money on a democrat loser anyway? Doesn’t make any sense to me.

    Comment by Auskunft — November 3, 2004 @ 9:34 pm

  5. it. Hope it pans out. But, then again…maybe she’ll run against Hillary in ’08, so she’ll keep him hanging around like Hill does Bill.


    Comment by radtec — November 4, 2004 @ 2:52 pm

  6. “Rodham-Clinton/Heinz-Kerry”??? That just made me shudder. Or maybe I just need to go to the restroom. Hard to tell.

    I will miss the dialogues. Perhaps another one close to the inauguration? I think it’s fertile ground.

    Comment by Mamamontezz — November 4, 2004 @ 5:17 pm

  7. Thank you all for the kind words. I had fun writing these.

    I doubt that they’ll be a #21, but Mamamontezz may be right. We’ll see.

    Comment by Jim - Parkway Rest Stop — November 4, 2004 @ 7:07 pm

  8. You are a cold and brutal man… wanna come and visit Arkansas?

    I think we would get along just fine.

    Comment by Mike S — November 5, 2004 @ 8:25 pm

  9. I really enjoyed the whole series. It would have made a wonderful ongoing skit on SNL or one of the late night talk shows. Greeeaaat Satire !! Hilarious !!

    Comment by mathmantom — November 6, 2004 @ 2:37 am

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