September 20, 2008

Verrry Interesting.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 5:10 pm

It has been widely reported that Barack ___ Obama was the second largest recipient of Fannie and Freddie’s largesse. Take a look at the numbers when the Fannie/Freddie contributions are plotted against time in congress. They really, really liked Barack ____ Obama.

One has to wonder what he did or chose not to do in exchange for all that loot.

h/t GuyK

September 19, 2008

Help Wanted: One Democrat.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:31 pm

According to the Obama Team, my lack of support for Barack ___ Obama means that I’m am either a racist, or I’m confused and stupid. I know that I’m not the former, so I must be the latter. Which is why I need a democrat.

P.S. Joe Biden need not apply. I believe I have a higher I.Q. than he does. I know I did way, way better in law school than he did.

September 17, 2008

Barack ____ Uh-bama.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 10:17 pm

(Language NSFW or for kiddies)

via C&S

September 16, 2008

Jersey Up For Grabs? (Updated)

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:52 pm

Whoa!

The contest between Barack Obama and John McCain in New Jersey is too close to call, with a new Quinnipiac University poll showing the battle for the state’s fifteen electoral votes at 48%-45% among likely voters. Obama led McCain by ten percentage points, 51%-41% in an August Quinnipiac poll.

This is the fourth independent poll within the last week to show New Jersey as an emerging battleground state in the presidential campaign. (Link)

One would never know that New Jersey voters are so evenly split from my admittedly unscientific bumper sticker and lawn sign count. I see lots of Obama stickers and lawn signs and virtually no McCain campaign stuff. The thing is that, in this state (at least in my part of the state), a McCain bumper sticker might well result in one’s car being keyed in a parking lot, and a lawn sign might well be torn up by the state’s progressives.

I would love to think that McCain has a shot in Jersey, but I’ve lived here all my life, so I fully expect that the massive Democrat Machine will do whatever is necessary to “take care of business” on election day.

Still, hope springs eternal. Maybe this year will be different. After all, Garden Staters are over-taxed, businesses large and small are over-taxed and-over-regulated, the majority of citizens have finally come to realize that Jon Corzine is a walking (lucky for him) disaster, and people are fleeing to other states to escape the madness.

We’ll keep our fingers crossed here in the state where the only people who carry guns are the cops and robbers.

Update: This state may be terminal.

What’s Next?

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:54 am

A fatwa?

September 15, 2008

Priorities.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:58 pm

I don’t know about you, but I feel better knowing that the New York Times has managed to track down Governor Palin’s hairdresser and wring the truth out of her.

Would someone please point these coconuts in the direction of Chicago.

September 14, 2008

Ask Hillary (Vol 11)

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 2:16 pm

hillary-typewriter
You’ve Got Questions? I’ve got Answers.
Because I’m Very Smart, and You’re … Very Not.


Dear Senator Clinton,

I’ve been crying my eyes out every single day since you lost the Democratic Primary. I know that if Democrats knew earlier on about what a dirtbag that that bastard Obama is, you would be running against that old fart instead of that arrogant blowhard Obama.

Senator Clinton, eighteen million of us cry our eyes out every day, and we just don’t know what to do on election day. What advice can you give us?

With warmest regards,
Sylvia Armbruster

Dear Sylvia:

Thank you for your kind words; they mean a lot to me. I know that you and millions of others are down in the dumps over what happened. I suggest you do a bunch of weed. You’ll feel much better.

As for what to do on election day, remember, I’ll be here in 2012, if you get my drift ;-)


Dear Senator Clinton:

I know that in an interview you gave back in July you mentioned that you personally dealt with your loss in the primary by smoking lots of weed and spitting on a large picture of Barack Obama. I tried that, but after a while, even that did not make the agony of defeat go away. Do you have any other suggestions?

Regards,
Canyon Stoner

Dear Canyon: (Groovy name, BTW)

Believe me, I know how you feel. After all that toking and spitting, I realized I still needed something to lift my spirits. Here’s what I did.

I took a ride to our local animal shelter to pick out a puppy. The nice young lady walked me to the area where the puppies are kept. They were all so cute, yipping and playing like crazy. But there was one who was standing in the front of the cage, staring at me. She tracked my every movement. She was a mixed breed, but she looked like she was part cocker spaniel. It’s hard to tell when they’re puppies. Anyway, she was perfectly precious, and I knew that she was the one for me. Right then and there, I named her “Venus.”

I bought one of those crates to bring Venus home. When I arrived home, I opened the door to the crate, and Venus leaped into my arms. I held her to me, as she squealed with delight and licked me all over my face – puppy kisses.

That’s when I cut her throat.

It was AWESOME.

I suggest you take a trip to the animal shelter and pick up a puppy. You’ll feel like a million bucks.


Dear Senator Clinton:

I will be frank. As much as I have always admired you, I supported Barack Obama in the primary. I saw your appearance with Senator Obama after the primary was over, at which time you pledged to enthusiastically support Barack.

In light of those low-life, lying, swift boating, election-stealing Republicans having nominated Sarah Palin to be Vice President and how she has disgraced feminism and charged up all the uneducated goobers in the country, especially those loudmouthed Wal-Mart brood sows, Barack could really use your active support right about now. I was wondering when you planned on hitting the campaign trail?

Sincerely,
Ronette Swithens

Dear Ronette:

Let me begin by saying that I appreciate that you chose to support Senator Obama over me in the primary elections. Hey, no hard feelings. After all, that’s the American Way, isn’t it?

As for campaigning for Senator Obama, I am anxious to do just that. The thing is that I want to get my nails done first, and my damned manicurist has gone abroad to visit relatives and probably will be away for a couple weeks. After that, I have a few dental appointments that I’ve canceled far too many times. Oh, and then there’s that darned cable company. They say that the cable guy will be here sometime in the next month between 9 and 5. Do they think that all we have to do with our lives is wait around for the cable guy?

Anyway, as soon as I get all that sorted out, I will hit the campain trail like Gangbusters!

One more thing: Who is this Sarah person you spoke of?


Previous Editions of “Ask Hillary”:

Vol. 1
Vol. 2
Vol. 3
Vol. 4
Vol. 5
Vol. 6
Vol. 7
Vol. 8
Vol. 9
Vol 10

September 13, 2008

Dinner With the Usual Suspects.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 9:29 pm

Went out tonight for dinner with several of the Usual Suspects to a local restaurant specializing in Northern Italian cuisine. Great food, BYO wine and booze (never a problem). Nice evening.

The Verdict: Everyone thinks Sarah Palin is Da Bomb, and Obama is a sorry ass. And we all vote. But, alas, this is New Jersey, the state that brought the world Bob Torricelli, Jim McGreevey, Bob Menendez, Frank “the Cadaver” Lautenberg and a collection of sewer rats in Trenton.

But vote we will.

That is all.

September 12, 2008

Roger Ebert – Douchebag.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:25 pm

So Roger Ebert, the who-gives-a-shit movie reviewer and putrid sack of pus, got whacked in the cruller by another film critic at the Toronto Film Festival. Yeah, I know that Roger is sick, but, fortuitous though the cruller whack may have been, the asshole had it coming.

I trust the American people will see through Palin, and save the Republic in November.

Yo, Roger. “Save the Republic?” Are you farookin’ nuts?

Take a read through the Constitution (or maybe take Civics 101). A “Republic” is about the last thing Obama and his ilk have an interest in preserving. In Obama’s world, yet more power would be ceded to the federal government and a judicial oligarchy ruled by the likes of Ruth Bader Ginsburg to decide cases based on considerations of foreign law and God knows what else.

I’m with the Other Rodger.

September 11, 2008

That Day.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 9:23 am

I think of that day every day, except on this day I think of that day a good deal more.

I shall never forget, and I shall never forgive. Never.

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