December 30, 2005

Cindy Sighting.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 7:08 pm

Hippy van.jpgOne of our ever-vigilant PRS Operatives, while on another assignment, happened to spot Cindy Sheehan while she and her Road Show stopped at one of the Garden State Parkway Rest Stops.

The encounter went as follows:

PRS: “Excuse me, ma’am, aren’t you Cindy Sheehan?”

Cindy: (singing) “When the moon is in the seventh house, and Jupiter aligns with Mars…then peace will guide our plannnn-et ….”

PRS: “Pardon me for interrupting, but aren’t you Cindy Sheehan?”

Cindy: “Yeah, that’s right.” (singing) “The Eastern World, it is explodin’ … violence flarin’ bullets loadin’ …You’re old enough to kill, but not for votin’…

PRS: “Ms. Sheehan, may I just have a moment of your time to ask you some questions?”

Cindy: “What?”

PRS: “I’m with PRS and I only need a minute or two of your time, if you wouldn’t mind.”

Cindy: “Have you spoken with my people?”

PRS: “Your people?”

Cindy: “Yeah, Sonny Boy. I’m a big goddamn deal. Besides, I never heard of this PRS thing you speak of. You’re talking to someone who has done interviews with Time, Newsweek, the New York Times, CBS and CNN. You have to talk with my agent. Maybe I can fit you in some time in the Spring.”

PRS: “The Spring? I had the sense that your notoriety was waning, and that’s what I wanted to talk with you about.”

Cindy: (singing) “How many roads must a man walk down, before you call him a man … and how many seas must a white dove sail …”

PRS:

Cindy: “Did you say ‘waning?’ I’ll have you know that I’m bigger than Elvis and John Lennon put together. You got any weed?”

PRS: “Sorry, no weed. How about a Tic Tac?”

Cindy: “Coke? How about some Coke? I could use a little pick-me-up, if ya know what I mean.”

PRS: “Would that be Diet or Classic?”

Cindy: “My God, you are, like, sooooo, L-7”

PRS: “L-7? I’m sorry; I don’t get that.”

Cindy: “Like square, man. Like, really ungroovy.” (singing) “How many times must the cannonballs fly, before they’re forever banned….”

PRS: “Ms. Sheehan, I have to ask you, what was the deal with that picture of you lying on your son’s grave?”

Cindy: “Did you like it? My people told me that the focus group said that I needed to do more horizontal grieving. I thought my hair looked damned good too.”

PRS: “And, what about that photo with you resting your head on Jesse Jackson’s back? Did your people tell you that you also needed to do more bi-racial grieving?”

Cindy: “No. I thought that up myself. Jesse is so, like, … dreamy. He also had some primo weed. He knows all the words to Purple Haze. I’ll bet you didn’t know that.”

PRS: “No, Ma’am I didn’t know that. How do you respond to those who are sympathetic to your loss, but who question whether you are being manipulated by various left-wing organizations?”

Cindy: “Acid? You got any acid? I feel like doin’ a tab.”

PRS: “Sorry, no acid.”

Cindy: “Mushrooms? They’d be good too. Got any of those? You like doin’ shrooms?”

PRS: “Thank you for your time, Ms. Sheehan.”

Cindy: (singing) “Picture yourself in a boat on a river, with tangerine seas and marmalade skies ….”

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