August 21, 2007

More on Not-So-Sharpe James.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:10 pm

Former mayor of Newark (The Sanctuary City), Sharpe James, spews his latest barrage of bullshit.

I have a couple thoughts on this:

1. Raymond Brown, a well known defense attorney, does not come cheap, but, to me, it is equally as likely that Mr. Brown is not having an easy time dealing with his arrogant and profoundly stupid client and, therefore, wants gracefully out; or

2. Not-So-Sharpe wants to keep the whereabouts of his mountains of unlawfully obtained cash secret, lest it be seized by the government.

I guess he figures either that he’ll beat the rap and still have lots of cash, or he’ll have some serious walkin’ around money when he’s released from Lewisburg when he’s in his nineties.

Just another political crud brought to you by New Jersey voters.

August 20, 2007

It’s Da Troot!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 6:30 pm

What’s not to like about this blog?

When Ya Really Need A Tree.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 6:26 pm

If I were this guy, the water would have been seriously brown.

Via Hot Air

August 19, 2007

Donner and Blitzen.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 2:46 pm


On Friday, after having had a rough week, which included the discovery of Mr. Stump, I headed to the deck to have a couple drinks of this on the rocks (clear ice, of course) in order to unwind and to get my psychic shit together. The skies opened, but the canopy on the deck kept me dry until the storm got super nasty. I took advantage of the occasion to take an artsy (for me, anyway) cell phone picture of the storm from behind a festive wind chime.

Fortunately, as you can see, there are more than a few trees left in the neighborhood.

Speaking of trees, did ya hear that Brooklyn actually has trees! I hear there are at least a hundred of them!

August 18, 2007

I Don’t Get No Respect.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 10:38 pm

No respect at all …………….


This, from the Wiseass Jooette who lives in the armpit of the Western World.

August 17, 2007

Mr. Stump.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 8:54 pm


This is what I saw directly in front of the House by the Parkway when I returned from work yesterday. The thing is that yesterday, before I left home for work, this was a tree roughly as high as my house. In fact, I used that tree that very morning to lean on to stretch my legs after my walk. I’ve been using that tree for that purpose for at least a half dozen years, and I sure as hell didn’t ask anyone to cut it down.

I know that it had to be the town that cut down the tree, because the town actually “owns” the trees that reside between the sidewalk and the curb. It was the town that planted the tree (now Mr. Stump) about fifteen years ago after some douche bag smacked into and destroyed the then-existing tree with his car.

But still, WTF? Nobody smacked into this tree. It was perfectly fine just ten hours earlier.

I entered the house pissed to the max.

When I asked Mrs. Parkway, who was home all day that day, if she saw that some son of a bitch cut down our tree, she explained that a town tree guy knocked on the door and explained that half the tree was dead. He opined that the tree should, therefore, be cut down, but that the frontage of the house was actually wide enough to accommodate two trees, which he said the town would return at a later date to plant.

Hell, I thought the tree was perfectly fine, but: (a) I’m not a tree mavin, and (b) there was no point in giving Mrs. Parkway or the town, for that matter, a ration of shit, as neither would have brought my tree back.

So, the bottom line is that, probably sometime in the tree planting season (whenever the hell that is) the town will show up and plant a couple saplings in front of the house. Great. I figure that by the time they are real trees, I’ll be seventy-farookin’-five. Hell, I’m still young enough to buy green bananas, but sheesh!

I think I would have kept the half-dead tree, which, as noted above, didn’t look at all dead to me.

Progress? Feh!

August 16, 2007

Muse News.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 7:13 pm

Dear Shithook Jimbo:

You thought I’d be back to work today, didn’t you? Admit it. You know you did.

Well, guess what. I’ve been checking around, and now I’m really pissed.

You know, if I worked for this guy or this guy, I’d only have to work a few days per month. I’d have it farookin’ made. Hell, if I worked for this guy or this babe I could actually show my poetic side. You wouldn’t know a decent poem if it bit you on your ass.

You might also be interested to know that I am considering an offer to work for Jesse Jackson, whom I have made aware of our current labor dispute. Working for Jesse, now there’s a real cakewalk. Jesse loved these:




So, Mr. Smart Guy, how’s the blog goin’? BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!


Your Muse

August 15, 2007


Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 6:49 pm

Dear Jimbo:

This note is to let you know that I’ve decided to take the day off.

Am I sick? Well, that’s sort of half of the problem. I’m sick and tired of being called upon damned near every farookin’ day at all hours of the day and night (and weekends too) to come up with stuff that doesn’t stink for your crummy blog.

Benefits? Forget it. You provide zero, zip, nada. Hell, I don’t even get a goddamned footnote for the occasional times I hit a long ball for you. You just wanna sit around drinking all sorts of spirits and hang with the Usual Suspects while I do all the heavy lifting around here, for absolutely no money, no benefits, no recognition and no goddamned respect. Hell, an illegal alien wouldn’t take this gig.

I may even take tomorrow off. And, maybe even the next day and the day after that. Waddya gonna do then, Mr. Great Farookin’ Hair? Post one of those “What Kind of Festering Pustule are You?” quizzes?


Very truly yours,

Your Muse

Cool Wheels.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 12:10 am

I only learned of this today – a car with a built-in guitar amplifier! And, the car comes with an electric guitar! How could I have missed this?

I may have to trade in the Big, Fat, Black Capitalist Car and get one of these units. The possibilities are endless.

I can see it now.

Promotional Stuff – Jimbo coming soon to the Raritan Toll Plaza! Future concert venues include the Sears parking lot in Watchung and the parking space directly opposite Ziggy’s Hot Dog Emporium in Seaside Heights! Get your tickets now!

News Stories — Jimbo wows the crowd outside the local 7-11! Sahid Green, the manager of the convenience store stated, “Sales were flat until Jimbo showed up with his musical car. He has such wide appeal. Not only are our Slurpee sales going through the roof, but we also are selling lots of soft food to his older fans. It’s fantastic!”


August 13, 2007

One Badass Unit.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jim @ 7:44 pm



A couple weeks ago, one of the main streets in my town was undergoing a bit of a face peel, which is to say that the top layers of asphalt were being removed in order to pave over the freshly scraped street with new black, smelly stuff. The operation took several days; it caused lots of traffic jams and pissed off more than a few merchants whose businesses suffered from zero traffic during business hours.

During one of my weekend walks while this was violent road work was going on I came upon this massive gizwiz, and was quite taken by it, so much so that I used Mr. Cell Phone camera to take some pictures. Unfortunately, the sun (damn you, Algore!) screwed up all of them except the two shown above.

This baby has as many gauges as a 747 and, like a 747, it has seats for two drivers, a pilot and a co-pilot for the street muncher! Very impressive.

I only wish I could have seen in actually gobbling up layers of street.

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